This is just something a friend wrote about me, and I was blushing when I read it.
"My new friend J is lost somewhere in the dating game as well. I met him in New York City when we went with the choir and band this past April (well, technically I knew him before then, but I never really talked to him). He is a really cool guy, on the bus ride home we discovered that we were both equally hostile towards dating. To tell you the truth, I admire J because he isn't one of those guys who will just date somebody for the sake of dating somebody. He has been single for awhile now, yet he still believes that there is somebody out there for everyone. I think that is so awesome that he doesn't give up, and I am convinced that he will find somebody soon because of his supreme coolness, there aren't too many guys out there like him :D."
Tuesday, May 13, 2008
Monday, May 12, 2008
It's Unpredictable But Really That's What Love's About
Good day people! Yes i'm back and i've actually got something on my mind and usually thats what makes me continue to write my blog. So friday night I usually go to my youthgroup as most of you know and I have a damn good time going. There's great people there and they all want to get closer to God which is what I want as well. However there are certain things that they believe which I don't agree with. Not religion related but rather dating world related.
So let me set the picture. We did a photo hunt on friday night so we got to go all around hamilton taking photos of the most random things and making random poses and such, and it was quite fun (although at one point I thought a police officer was going to yell at us). Any ways, I was driving with our one leader Mark and his fiance Jen, and two other teens on photo team. When we had finished up the night we headed back to our meeting place for parents to come pick up the kids and what not. Our team made a small detour to drop off Jen at her house. When Jen left we all noticed that Mark didn't kiss her goodnight, which I found a little odd but then again it's their relationship and they hand P.D.A's however they want. Here's the kicker as we're pulling out of the driveway he begins to explain why he didn't. He said that it was because that once he started he wouldn't want to stop. He wouldn't want to let go. I can understand that since i've seen how Giacomo and Felicia say goodbye and it takes freaking forever sometimes. No offense to them but I have shit to do and I don't like to wait. No patience what so ever. Sorry, let's get back on topic. Mark then went on to say to the other girl in our car, Jessie, that she would find someone and that she wouldn't want to let go of. Then Mark asked her if she liked anyone, to which she made the perfect grade 10 response of "boys suck". Not that I expected anything different. Mark then said that it was good that she didn't have anyone and that guys shouldn't be of concern until she's 18 or 19. You can imagine that by this time I had a few words floating around in my head but I kept them to myself mainly because I hate to overstep my boundries.
Jessie then said that she might not find somebody to which I had to respond to by saying "there's someone out there for everyone". Mark immeadiately responded with, "thats not true. I know tons of people that are older that don't have anyone special". Thats where we parted ways on the this thing we call love. I'm a firm believer in that there's someone out there for everyone, no matter who they are, what they look like or what they've done. How can their not be? I mean if God hadn't intended to make a significant other for everyone then why are their so many people on this earth? That wouldn't make sense. I mean I know that it seems reasonable that not everyone may find someone but if you talk like that then the chances that you would have are cut in half and then your left with nothing. You go through life lonely and scarred. Look at me, single for the last year and a bit now, and I know that there's a girl out there for me. She may not be here at the moment but she eventually will walk into my life and when she does i'll know. Then again, on the other hand she might already be in my life and I just don't know it.
Me and my friend kayleen were talking earlier about this topic and we both feel the same about dating. The exception for Kayleen is that she's got a boyfriend (they've only been together a week) and for the moment she's got her special someone. Her fear however is that she can't let him and, which is understandble because it's hard to do that in any relationship. She also said that it felt like he was expecting them to be together forever already which isn't something she wants to think about in highschool. Of course she asked me if I had anyone special in my heart at the moment which I politley said no to. She was quick to remind me that my special someone could already be here waiting for me. I had a little laugh because I know this could be true. What made it better was that she told me that I was a great guy and that i'll make some girl happy one day, so at least I know when I re-enter the dating game i'll be decent at it this time around. Of course I told her that life is unpredictable and that you just never know. Plus with that logic it could mean that at one point in time I could end up dating her or whoever. Another thing we agreed upon. The future....something that's been on my mind for a while now. But that is a blog for another time, and with that in mind I must say my farwells for now.
J-moose
So let me set the picture. We did a photo hunt on friday night so we got to go all around hamilton taking photos of the most random things and making random poses and such, and it was quite fun (although at one point I thought a police officer was going to yell at us). Any ways, I was driving with our one leader Mark and his fiance Jen, and two other teens on photo team. When we had finished up the night we headed back to our meeting place for parents to come pick up the kids and what not. Our team made a small detour to drop off Jen at her house. When Jen left we all noticed that Mark didn't kiss her goodnight, which I found a little odd but then again it's their relationship and they hand P.D.A's however they want. Here's the kicker as we're pulling out of the driveway he begins to explain why he didn't. He said that it was because that once he started he wouldn't want to stop. He wouldn't want to let go. I can understand that since i've seen how Giacomo and Felicia say goodbye and it takes freaking forever sometimes. No offense to them but I have shit to do and I don't like to wait. No patience what so ever. Sorry, let's get back on topic. Mark then went on to say to the other girl in our car, Jessie, that she would find someone and that she wouldn't want to let go of. Then Mark asked her if she liked anyone, to which she made the perfect grade 10 response of "boys suck". Not that I expected anything different. Mark then said that it was good that she didn't have anyone and that guys shouldn't be of concern until she's 18 or 19. You can imagine that by this time I had a few words floating around in my head but I kept them to myself mainly because I hate to overstep my boundries.
Jessie then said that she might not find somebody to which I had to respond to by saying "there's someone out there for everyone". Mark immeadiately responded with, "thats not true. I know tons of people that are older that don't have anyone special". Thats where we parted ways on the this thing we call love. I'm a firm believer in that there's someone out there for everyone, no matter who they are, what they look like or what they've done. How can their not be? I mean if God hadn't intended to make a significant other for everyone then why are their so many people on this earth? That wouldn't make sense. I mean I know that it seems reasonable that not everyone may find someone but if you talk like that then the chances that you would have are cut in half and then your left with nothing. You go through life lonely and scarred. Look at me, single for the last year and a bit now, and I know that there's a girl out there for me. She may not be here at the moment but she eventually will walk into my life and when she does i'll know. Then again, on the other hand she might already be in my life and I just don't know it.
Me and my friend kayleen were talking earlier about this topic and we both feel the same about dating. The exception for Kayleen is that she's got a boyfriend (they've only been together a week) and for the moment she's got her special someone. Her fear however is that she can't let him and, which is understandble because it's hard to do that in any relationship. She also said that it felt like he was expecting them to be together forever already which isn't something she wants to think about in highschool. Of course she asked me if I had anyone special in my heart at the moment which I politley said no to. She was quick to remind me that my special someone could already be here waiting for me. I had a little laugh because I know this could be true. What made it better was that she told me that I was a great guy and that i'll make some girl happy one day, so at least I know when I re-enter the dating game i'll be decent at it this time around. Of course I told her that life is unpredictable and that you just never know. Plus with that logic it could mean that at one point in time I could end up dating her or whoever. Another thing we agreed upon. The future....something that's been on my mind for a while now. But that is a blog for another time, and with that in mind I must say my farwells for now.
J-moose
Thursday, May 8, 2008
Saturday, May 3, 2008
Guitar Players Cry
This pen of mine doens't write anymore. It's used up all it's ink. The papers on my desk don't fill up like they used to. My mind is so blank and i'll never know why. Those words I wrote were the last ones, my life, my body, my blood. What I used to say doesn't work anymore and it's not that I want to stop. But when you've reached your breaking point, you fall down from the top.
And it's creeping back to me these chords that I don't want to see. They don't fit these words anymore and they never will. It's like i've lost my ability to speak, and it's never coming back. My words are gone and this pen stays dry and i'm just a lonely guitar player and this is my cry.
My guitar sits in the shadows now it's not a piece of me. It's when I look back that my mind still wonders to those 6 little blunders, the A, the B, The C, The D, the E, the F or the G. I'm tired, i'm lonely and i'm feeling so low, and these notes aren't helping so i wish they'd just go. Over the top i'm just a musical flop and a sell out to corporate flair. I'm not what I seem i'm cool but not clean these eyes are meant to stare.
And it's creeping back to me these chords that I don't want to see. They don't fit these words anymore and they never will. It's like i've lost my ability to speak, and it's never coming back. My words are gone and this pen stays dry and i'm just a lonely guitar player and this is my cry.
Something i wrote about losing your inspiration. I haven't had any new ideas flow into me for a while. And I apologize for that.
J-moose
Wednesday, April 16, 2008
A Friendship For The Ages
Lately i've been thinking about someone who rarely crosses my mind anymore. An old friend, that i've unfortunately lost touch with. It's sad, because the friendship that we had shaped me to become the person you have all come to know, so it was difficult to realise that I could no longer turn to this person in my times of need.
Let me begin from the top....a few weeks before my 10th birthday, my family informed us that we would be going skiing with the family of one of my mothers co-workers. They had been planning this out for a while now, and to my dismay I had to be social, because the other family had a son my age. The real kicker for me, was that this trip was happening on my birthday so again, another reason for me to not like this kid, or his family. A week prior to the trip the other family came over for coffee and dessert, which served as a chance for the kids to fraternize and get to know one another. If I remember correctly, my first impression of Nick Jeffrey was that he was an annonying little brat, who was completely oblivious to video games, cartoons, and all the fun things a 1o year old enjoyed. I made the most of the night and figured this kid to be decent enough to play with on the trip. One week later we shipped off to the Jeffrey's cabin and began our weekend long adventure. To me, it wasn't all that fun, but then again, when have I ever been known to have fun at any social event.
Alright, lets skip ahead a few months. So finally Nick got a gameboy and the very first pokemon game, Pokemon Blue. Being the kid he was, he'd never as much as touched a gameboy muchless played a video game. So he should he call to ask how to get past all the dangers of the pokemon world...Me. At age 10 I prided myself in being better than others so whenever I got the oppurtunity to show off I took it. We began conversing over the phone, me explaining what a pokemon was, and how to play, and him gasping in excitement. Not to say I didn't enjoy showing him up, but it got pretty annonying after a while. Skip ahead another month or so. Me and Nick had scarcely seen one another, and in the times we did hang out, I pretty much bored him to death by not wanting to do anything that involved physical activity. Oddly enough, I began to trust Nick a bit more, and eventually we began chilling almost every weekend. A few years down the road, probably at age 12 0r 13, Nick had a problem with his heart. He needed surgery to correct it, and when i found out i was pretty upset. The operation was a success but it changed Nick into a completely different person. It was like a complete 360 for the guy. Now instead of me being the leader in our duo, Nick began to take charge. He began losing weight, and playing waterpolo, which I eventually got drafted into as well. It was weird seeing him like this because I was so used to having the old Nick. Then again, the new Nick was just the kind of kid I needed to hang around with.
Nick became one of the most popular guys at his high school and pretty much knew any and everyone in all the grades. Of course I was intrigued in hearing about his tales of how was getting invited to all these different social events and how he made out with this girl in this grade. Usually those thoughts didn't cross my mind, but when Nick talked about them, it was like nothing else seemed to matter. Of course out of the two of us, Nick was the one who began going out on dates with some of the most attractive girls i've ever met, so my jealousy levels were at their max. It was odd, because despite the fact that he had all these new found friends, he still managed to call me up at least twice a week just to chat. Even the popular guys need their advice and I was happy enough to give it.
It's been almost half a year since I last saw Nick, and i'm saddened that our friendship came to such an abrubt halt, but at least I know he's doing good. My mom occassionally talks to his mom, so i'll usually be able to find out how he's doing. I've been thinking about him a lot lately so that's why I choose to write about our friendship. Everything we did is only a memory now, and here I thought i'd had the best man for my wedding already. It's weird thinking about the friends that we once had. It's even weirder since next year i'm starting the friend making process all over again, since i'll only have one friend at BT and that will only help me so much. Until next time..which will be soon, I promise!
J-moose
Let me begin from the top....a few weeks before my 10th birthday, my family informed us that we would be going skiing with the family of one of my mothers co-workers. They had been planning this out for a while now, and to my dismay I had to be social, because the other family had a son my age. The real kicker for me, was that this trip was happening on my birthday so again, another reason for me to not like this kid, or his family. A week prior to the trip the other family came over for coffee and dessert, which served as a chance for the kids to fraternize and get to know one another. If I remember correctly, my first impression of Nick Jeffrey was that he was an annonying little brat, who was completely oblivious to video games, cartoons, and all the fun things a 1o year old enjoyed. I made the most of the night and figured this kid to be decent enough to play with on the trip. One week later we shipped off to the Jeffrey's cabin and began our weekend long adventure. To me, it wasn't all that fun, but then again, when have I ever been known to have fun at any social event.
Alright, lets skip ahead a few months. So finally Nick got a gameboy and the very first pokemon game, Pokemon Blue. Being the kid he was, he'd never as much as touched a gameboy muchless played a video game. So he should he call to ask how to get past all the dangers of the pokemon world...Me. At age 10 I prided myself in being better than others so whenever I got the oppurtunity to show off I took it. We began conversing over the phone, me explaining what a pokemon was, and how to play, and him gasping in excitement. Not to say I didn't enjoy showing him up, but it got pretty annonying after a while. Skip ahead another month or so. Me and Nick had scarcely seen one another, and in the times we did hang out, I pretty much bored him to death by not wanting to do anything that involved physical activity. Oddly enough, I began to trust Nick a bit more, and eventually we began chilling almost every weekend. A few years down the road, probably at age 12 0r 13, Nick had a problem with his heart. He needed surgery to correct it, and when i found out i was pretty upset. The operation was a success but it changed Nick into a completely different person. It was like a complete 360 for the guy. Now instead of me being the leader in our duo, Nick began to take charge. He began losing weight, and playing waterpolo, which I eventually got drafted into as well. It was weird seeing him like this because I was so used to having the old Nick. Then again, the new Nick was just the kind of kid I needed to hang around with.
Nick became one of the most popular guys at his high school and pretty much knew any and everyone in all the grades. Of course I was intrigued in hearing about his tales of how was getting invited to all these different social events and how he made out with this girl in this grade. Usually those thoughts didn't cross my mind, but when Nick talked about them, it was like nothing else seemed to matter. Of course out of the two of us, Nick was the one who began going out on dates with some of the most attractive girls i've ever met, so my jealousy levels were at their max. It was odd, because despite the fact that he had all these new found friends, he still managed to call me up at least twice a week just to chat. Even the popular guys need their advice and I was happy enough to give it.
It's been almost half a year since I last saw Nick, and i'm saddened that our friendship came to such an abrubt halt, but at least I know he's doing good. My mom occassionally talks to his mom, so i'll usually be able to find out how he's doing. I've been thinking about him a lot lately so that's why I choose to write about our friendship. Everything we did is only a memory now, and here I thought i'd had the best man for my wedding already. It's weird thinking about the friends that we once had. It's even weirder since next year i'm starting the friend making process all over again, since i'll only have one friend at BT and that will only help me so much. Until next time..which will be soon, I promise!
J-moose
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