Hold Me In Your Arms

Hold Me In Your Arms

When we first began I made you a promise, one that i'll always keep. I said that I would hold you, even when your not there. My arms would always find you, and show you how I care. You told me I was crazy, but to me it's all the same. I'll still hold you, even if your not game. Days will pass and nights will fall, and when your all alone, my arms will be your guiding lights, to lead you right back home. Each day is something different, and I know to treat it with care. My one goal each day is to show you, just how much I care. If you cannot believe this, then you don't deserve to see, my arms are always open, but you clearly will never see. I say this because I love you, and to show much I care, I want you to feel special even when i'm not there. People always tell me that no one ever cares. No one ever listens and takes the time to say "i'm here to always help, I will never turn away". To turn away is not my path, i'm here to stay. I will always hold you, with each passing day.

J-moose

Everybody's Changing And I Don't Feel The Same

So I might fail grade 12. Yeah, i'm ashamed, and truthfully i've cried a fair few times about it now. I'm sure most of you know why I might fail, but for those not at my school i'll enlighten you. I failed grade 12 music. How? Well for startersI put no effort into the course and did none of the assignments and ultimately it came back to bite me in the ass. So with my last exam being written this past morning, I need to pass it to graduate. My teacher told me I would, but honestly I pretty much BS'd the entire thing so I wouldn't be suprised if I fail.

Update: I graduated.....but i shouldn't have. I didn't deserve to.

So tonight was our prom/grad dinner dance. As most people know, i'm not big on dances, and really this one was no different than any other one. Let me lay down the night for you. So I went to my friend Natasha's house for pictures and such before the dance. Her and my friend Sonja looked very beautiful, so me showing up with two girls was already looking like a positive side to the night. Natasha's uncle drove us in his vintage 78 impala, which was pretty sweet with the wind blowing in my face. Now when we got there of course people were already doing the photo thing. One, I do not like photo's, and two I hate every photo that i'm in because I look bad in them. For the sake of tonight I tried to ease up a bit, but people just don't let up with those camera's and I really didn't want to be in more than what was necessary. Now most people can be polite and eat what's put in front of them, but again i'm a picky eater and by picky I mean i eat perservatives and nothing but, so I pretty much ate bread and desert the whole night.

When I first got there they announced that there was someone taking requests for songs so naturally I was drawn to said person and of course requested two songs. One, apparitions by Matthew Good Band, and two, Disarm by Smashing Pumpkins. Now both of these are acoustic songs and personally I don't think it would have been a big deal to play them. What do you think we ended up with? The same shit that they play at every dance. The most popular rap, pop, hip hop and techno music, which is code for crap. I mean yeah, there's the odd rap song that is good, like anything from classified or kanye west, although he is a little whiner. Plus having to suffer through that " I kissed a girl song" was increadibly painful. So where do you think I ended up? At my table sitting there pondering why I even bothered to come and why people made such a big deal over this night.

The part that really ticked me off was that despite having so much repsect for their students the teachers still had to be the ones that make you feel bad. Naturally my eyes wandered around the dance floor and to the tables, where I happened to notice my english teacher and one other teacher staring at me. The teacher I didn't know gave me a little wave before pointing at me and turned to my english teacher, most likely asking, who is that and why is he sitting there by himself. Imagine how that's supposed to make you feel. I went through that with students for a long time and now teachers have the nerve to do it? What is wrong with people? Let's get one thing straight, I may not be the most outgoing person in the world, I may not be the most enthusiastic when it comes to school, but i'm a damn nice person. If I make fun of someone, I almost immeadiately say that i'm kidding and apologize, because I hate offending someone. For a teacher to have the nerve to do that just really pisses me off.

All in all, I can't say I didn't expect this to happen. I'm not outgoing so I wouldn't go up on the dance floor and not care if I looked like a moron, and I didn't ask anyone to come as my date so really it was kind of expected. Then again, effort is required to make anything happen, so this is also my fault for not trying. Ah well, at least I get another chance next year..

J-moose

Oblivion

The title of this blog is derived from a song of the same name by the band Wintersleep. I've been listening to it non-stop lately so I recommend checking it out.

First off, the delay in blogs isn't something I was expecting but none the less, we all make due with what we have. Let's get down to the nitty gritty. So sunday night the 2008 MMVA's took place. For those of you in America the MMVA's are like the MTV music video awards, except they take place outside and close down a good part of downtown Toronto for 4 days. I should note, MMVa stands for Muchmusic Video Awards. Now for the last few years the awards have been on a slight decline since Much was bought out by CTV globe media, and this year proves why we Much has taken a turn for the worse. I don't care much for presenters but really, did we have to bring in Brody Jenner? And for that matter why was Rain Wilson there? Don't get me wrong I love the Office, but him and unscripted comedy are like Angelina Jolie without her Botox injections. Not a pretty sight. The one thing that really upset me was the MuchLoud Best Rock Video. Now the nominees in this of course have to be a rock band right? WRONG! According to Much, Simple Plan is now classified as rock. Like hell they're rock. Here's a Simple Plan for ya Much, nominate people that actually make rock music. It's not hard. Even though The Trews and Illscarlett made it into the category it doesn't make it any better. MuchLoud is about Loud music, and bands that play hard rock, metal, and anything sub-genred within that. So really not one of the bands nominated deserved to win. As far as performances go, I can't really say I was all enthused. Simple Plan, Flo Rida, Girlicious, Sean Kingston, Ill Scarlett, Jabbawockez, Kardinal Offishal ft. Akon, and New Kids On The Block. Now there's something wrong with this picture...Oh yeah, the American acts outweigh the Canadian acts 5-3. This is a "Canadian" awards show, not Canada wants to see 80's boy bands relive their glory days. And really, NKOTB? When I heard they had a huge announcement performance wise I was expecting Coldplay, or The Offspring, or even Weezer (Even though the red album is supposed to suck, hearing them do "Pork and Beans" live would have been a treat), or even Madonna would have been nice. Instead we got Mark Whalbergs brother trying to be a pimp when really the word doesn't apply to him since it didn't in the 80's and nothing has changed in those 9 years he dropped off the face of the earth. As for Kardinal Offishal I was expecting a lot more. If I was to buy one Rap cd it would be something of his, because the dude knows how to make good music. With that in mind, it's expected that a live performance would only make his talents all that much better. We couldn't have been more wrong. First off Akon should probably have started singing when the track began and not 10 seconds after. Smooth Akon. I muted it after that point as watching a performance where the artist has to sing with the track playing in the background isn't worth my time. I'm too tired to keep remembering the negatives, but props to Wintersleep for winning the Videofact award. The video for Weighty Ghost has been on my Ipod for the last month and I can't get enough of it. Thats it for now kids, but i'll try to post again soon, and trust me i've got some stories, and their bound to be interesting reads.

J-moose

Party People

Now when I was younger, there were instances in my life that caused me to be antisocial. At age 10 I gave up trying to impress others with being someone i'm not and instead put on a new persona, someone who was constantly angry with the other children and just kept to himself. As I progressed in age I began to slowly lower my guard and come to trust certain others, but even still it took some work to really trust them. When grade 8 dawned upon me I came out of my little shell (0r big for those of you that know me), and decided i'd make myself noticed a bit more. I made a few friends, but I didn't trust them at all. By this point in time I had already become accustomed to thinking that regardless of who talked to me and regardless of what was said, I couldn't believe in them. There were times when I was wrong, and I admit that, but there were other times when I was right, and I knew that I was still the one being left our of all the fun. All the inside jokes, and all the hangouts that didn't include me took their toll on me, and even I became annoyed with myself when I asked what they were talking about. At age 18 it's nice to see nothing has really changed.

Let me explain, tonight I was invited to a suprise party for a friend named Stephanie, and it was going to be with a group of people that I had never hung out with, just known them vicariously. When I first got the invite I immeadiately thought of rejecting it because of how I imagined it would go. Me trying to awkwardly fit in, while they all have fun. Then again, i'm the anti-social one so really if I didn't have fun it would have been my own fault. Anyways I ended up deciding to go. Of course I wasn't supposed to since I hadn't cleaned my room but since my mother wasn't around and my father is oblivious to her nagging me, he brought me to the party.

So when I got there I pretty much knew who everyone was, so introductions weren't really necessarily. There was a good 20 minutes before the birthday girl showed up so I tried to be as social as possible, but being me I just kind of fiddled around with my ipod. Yes, I said fiddled, get over it. Ok, so eventually the birthday girl shows up and is shocked to see all her friends in her basement. I didn't really say all that much the entire night, mainly because I wouldn't have known what to. I did exchange a few words with Kayleen, Jenae and Tyler, but still I know that I could have talked to the others there. Ahh well, the way I see it is if I hadn't wanted to go I wouldn't have, but I needed to try something new and it was a good time even if I didn't say too much. That's all for now.

J-moose

Laughter Cures All

Wow, I never imagined James Franco as funny but there it is.