It's 1:13 am. I'm trying to study for Radio production and failing miserably. I feel like shit. Dan just looks over it once and he remembers it like it's second nature. I get distracted by flashy things and facebook and then when I try to look it over, I can't remember. It's my own fault really. I should keep studying, but i'm ready to sleep.
Stand up on the ground and look around, see if she's still here. Maybe in the moments I was gone, she disappeared. By now i'm sure she's gunnin for a new face to hold to her in the candle light. If she looks back, i'll be waiting like a good boy, barking into the night. She says it's not enough to want, but i'm drawn in by my own sense of perfection. To the world she's so cool and she ain't nobodies fool, she's own damn art show. Showin off like picaso once, she's got no refrain, she don't waste it
At night I call her name and she doens't call back, its always the same. She's the girl who changed my world, yeah it's always same, boys all play her game.
Not directed at anyone, mainly because I don't have any promiscuous friends, male or female.
I hate myself. I hate the promises I make to do better. I hate lying to myself about how i'm so much better than the way I act. I hate how I give up after 20 minutes. I just don't know what to do with myself. I don't know if I want to spend my life wondering if the path I'm taking is the right one. I don't want to worry that i'm not doing well in school. I want confidence. I feel like my confidence in my abilities has gone downhill so fast that I'm just no use to anyone. I'm not who I should be. I hate it. God, if you really exist and you by some mystery of the universe read this, I don't blame you for any of it. I want to do well, and i'm failing. Every day I dread getting up because I dread being a disappointment to myself. I don't care about disappointing others, I want to make myself proud. Fuck everyone else, I do what I do for me.
Gotta love the Pixies. An awesome band if I do say so. I recently bought their second album "Doolittle". Unfortunately I haven't gotten around to listening to it yet, but the songs I have listened to are awesome. Monkey Gone to Heaven, for example is one of those songs that I find you'll either really like or really think WTF.
Anyways that's not why i'm here and writing again. I think i've finally gotten to the point where I can actually write something on here and not be worried if i'm going to think "Wow, what was the point in that? You just wrote because you felt like you had to do it, not because you wanted too". I opened up this page over 2 hours ago and I wrote that first little bit there as soon as I. The rest of this is being written at 12:30 am. No lie. I was listening to High and Dry by Radiohead, which I just heard for... well not the first time, but it's the first time I found out the name of the song and the artist. Anyways, it was just so soft that it made me wanna write on here. So here we go.
It's been a weird couple of months...no longer than that since i've actually had anything good to write here. Have I changed? Yeah, but we'll get to that shortly. I guess the biggest thing now is that i'm in college. Yeah I finally made it to post secondary education. I was shocked myself, so please take a moment to let that sink in. I'm sure i've posted this somewhere else down the line but what the hell, this is where i'll actually have some meaning behind it. I'm studying Radio, Film and Television broadcasting. Is it hard? Yeah, it's challenging. I'm not a very focused person so it makes it even harder when i'm trying to study. I enjoy the program but I keep feeling like it's what I want but it's not how I imagined I would be going about it. I I don't even know what I mean by that. I look around from time to time and I see people making new friends and having fun, yet i'm just not like them and I can't understand why I'm not trying to be more like them. Wait, scratch that, I hate trying to be like other people.
I guess the more I want to change the more i'm gonna stay the same. Still, I wouldn't have it any other way. The school is located down in Welland, so i'm staying in residence, which is...well lets put it this way, the walls need to become soundproof. Even brick is not good enough to block out the room next to mine. No not my roommate, but the guy on the other side of my room just got rockband and has people over all the time, and I can hear them pounding on the plastic drums. Not pleasant when i'm trying to sleep.
I get along fairly well with my roommate, Dan. He's a good guy. Sometimes I feel bad because my tendency to begin yelling at him for my own stupidity and quick to anger nature, makes me seem like i'm overly angry all the time, which i'm not...3/4 of the time. Yeah i'm still a little bit of anger bug but i'm trying. Then there are the times when i'm trying to be funny or say something smart and it just turns out to be another lame attempt on my part, which make me wonder if i'm trying too hard or if i'm just not cut out to try at all. I'm content with being in the background, it's a known fact. Dan has the ability to make friends easily, in fact whenever someone comes to our room they're looking for him. I don't think anyone has come to our room looking for me...ever. But I never give them a reason to, so again, I don't really care.
I've made some interesting friends at college, but again it's the same as I said above. I'm not the person they'll call on to hang out with or have a drink with. I'm not that person. Plus everyone I know is high 1/2 the time, and I'm not in to that at all. Not that there's anything wrong with it, i'm just not that kind of person. I've thought about doing it sure, but it's not that appealing to me, plus with my current health I can't take any chances that something could throw me off balanace again.
Current Health? Yeah i've got health problems. It's not that bad, but then again it is. In the month of May I had a seizure after working out. I had just finished running on my treadmill and had gone upstairs to my room and laid down on my bed and begun to play with my Nintendo DS. I guess after playing for a few moments I blacked out and dropped to the floor beside my bed, narrowly missing my night stand, and started to have a seizure. It was weird. I don't remember it much, but I came to as they were taking me to the hospital. I had to call in sick to work that morning and had my drivers license suspended.
I've gone for numerous tests since the incident and it was determined that I have abnormal brain waves, which means I could have been having seizures for years while sleeping and no one ever knew. I was offered medication but I declined because I thought if I took it I would be admitting I had a condition, which at the time I wasn't prepared to do. Flash forward to Christmas day. I was in sudbury at my grandparents house, sitting on the couch with my laptop and watching tv. Apparently I blacked out again and dropped to the floor once more, landing myseld in a sudbury hospital. I was discharged after 2 hours there. Not a pleasant way to spend Christmas day.
I was weaker than i've ever been the following few days. I hated it, and I hated my body. I went back to the Neurologist who I saw after the first seizure and ultimately told me I wouldn't be getting my license back for a while. I had to inform him that i'd had another seizure which led to him diagnosing me with Epilepsy. Yup, I'm epileptic. It's not as bad as it sounds. However my days of playing video games for hours on end have been cut back tremendously. That's for the good of my health though, as much as I hate to admit it. What's possibly the worst part is that i'm now in the process of getting to wear a medical alert bracelet again. Again? Yes, when I was 6 I was diagnosed with a severe allergy to latex, which is pretty much rubber. Yes, i've heard all the condom jokes already so please keep them to yourselves. When I was 16 we found out that I was misdiagnosed or had somehow outgrown the allergy, which was said to be impossible (Go me!). So I said bye bye to the bracelet i'd grown accustomed to wearing for 10 years. Now i've gotta start that again.
If you're wondering, yes i'm still single. I know, you'd think with me being in College i'd actually meet somebody and try to go on a date or two, but it's just not happening. Every girl in my program is either dating already, not interested in me (which I can just tell by the way they act, not because i've tried asking them out or anything), or just not appealing to me. No i'm not entirely shallow but come on, looks do play a part. Every girl in residence that i've seen thus far is just not appealing either. They're all party girls or rich girls who want only the guys that are attractive and can spoil them. In all honesty i'm not really interested in dating...at all. Yeah a relationships fun I guess, but it's not what i'm looking for. But it's not like i'm looking for a one night stand or anything. I'm just not interested in Women right now. Unless I meet some girl that is in my range and I become completely infatuated with her and I know she feels the same, than yeah I might go for it. Otherwise, i'm happy being alone on a friday and saturday night.
As depressing as that sounds, the invitation to go out and do shit doesn't come up often for me. Sure, I could call someone and ask if they're free, but the way I figure it, is if they haven't called me yet, they're busy doing other stuff or they're with their significant other. I think the only person, on wait make that 2 people, that I have back home that are not dating currently are Ryan and Jenae. I hung out with Ryan over the christmas break so i'm not gonna make him chill with me the weekend after I last saw him. And Jenae...well we spent last night having an argument over facebook which we both realized could have been done in person if we'd known we were both not doing anything.
Wow, i've written a lot.
Time for bed
J-moose
P.S
Here's radiohead with High and Dry, an amazing song which they haven't played live in over a decade because they've said "It's not bad...it's very bad". They hated it but their record lable made them but it on their 94' album "The Bends". This is a live version of the song but it's just as good as the record version. Enjoy
Hello blog world. Don't give me that look, I know it's been quite some time since I last had anything to say, so I apologize for not being here sooner. Nothing interesting seems to be happening to me anymore. It's gotten to the point where i'm not repeating the same day, but close enough so that tiny little things will change, and i'll take notice, thus making it different...if that makes any sense.
Anyways, i'm not too sure why I decided to come back on here, but something tells me i'm going to be here again in the upcoming weeks...not sure if that's good or bad.
and I smile like the devil smiles, unseen but proud,
but truth be told I don't know who's at the helm,
just sit tight and i'll make my way to you"
Thank god Matthew Good released a new album. I'd probably be going insane if I didn't have his words to get me by.
Vancouver (the new album), is Good at his best. He's not doing that cheap alterna-country crap that was on his last album, he's finally back to rocking out hard with lyrics that inspire me to want to write again. The quote at the top of the page is from the song "On Nights Like Tonight". When I first heard it, I kind of felt like I was reliving a night like that. Memories flooded in of the times I walked up and down the streets of Ancaster, listening to my Ipod and knowing that one day it'll all be worth it, and to endure any inner turmoil that i'm going through. I try to smile as often as possible, but some days it's harder than others to make a sincere face.
I....don't have much else to say. My life has been quite dull since I left for school. Sure i've made two great friends in Dan And Jordan, but my mind constantly tells me that I can't always hang off them in my need to fit in. They've managed to make friends with the people in their labs, but I can't seem to do that. The people in my labs are just...idiots. Some of them are alright, like Russel and James, but there's others that i'd rather just not talk with. Not because their bad people, but I don't see myself being friends with them or talking to them outside of class. I constantly battle with myself whenever Dan has friends over to our room. I want to come out of my room and go talk with them and hang out, but I can't do it. To me, I see it as those are his people, and I don't wanna invade into their territory. I guess it can't be helped though, I was like this in high school as well. The only difference was I had Kristina there to talk with if things got too tough. I miss her more than I miss any one else from Ancaster.
I went into the walmart I used to work at on Saturday just to say hi to people and see how everyone was doing. It was good to see Paul and.....well it was good to see Paul. Taylor wasn't working until 4 so I missed seeing her. I did see Shelby though...I think it was more awkward than anything. I even saw Ryan, one of my supposed closer friends, and it didn't feel like he was to happy that I was there either. I mean we talked for a few minutes but he was leaving so he wanted to get out of there as quickly as possible, which is understandable, but still it was like, why are you here again? You don't work here, so we don't care what you're doing here, just do it and get out. After that I decided to go visit Omar over at Futureshop. He managed to leave walmart about 2 weeks after I did, and he was happy to do so. I think I talked to Omar longer than I did with anyone else. I think he's the only person from walmart who actually misses my presence, excluding Taylor and Paul.
I sound like I'm expecting people to jump for joy when I go in there, but that wasn't the intention. I guess I was just hoping I had made more of an impact on people there, but I guess not.
I'll say it again, I miss you Kristina Graham, some days more than others.
I know who you’re waiting for. No one’s coming though.
I haven’t a lot of time to write these days. With the release of the new record only days away, I’ve been doing a great deal of press and find myself too exhausted to ponder commenting on current events when I’ve free time. I commonly find myself sitting chairs, staring at nothing, trying to put all the pieces floating around in my head together regarding the upcoming tour – what songs to do, what not to do, how to go about it all in an impacting way.
I have well over 100 songs in my catalogue, which means that playing for 90 minutes, or even 120 minutes, is a significant challenge when it comes to deciding what to play. Obviously, performing 6 or 7 songs off the new record is a given, which leaves 7 to 9 others up in the air. You can’t please everyone, nor can I rehearse with a band for two weeks and get over, say, 80 songs down so that random numbers can be pulled out of thin air. It’s something that becomes more daunting every time I tour with a band – how to formulate the show.
On my way into town the other day I spent some time doing some homework. I listened to Beautiful Midnight from beginning to end. It’s hard to imagine that it came out ten years ago this month. It’s equally as hard to imagine that there was a time when I played most of those songs live. Were you to hand me a guitar and ask me to play A Boy And His Machine Gun or Failing The Rorschach Test the truth is that I couldn’t. I remember the melodies, but even the words have escaped me, not to mention the chord progressions. True, it wouldn’t be that difficult to quickly sit down and figure them out, but that just adds more fuel to the fire – what to play, what not to, what’s relevant, what isn’t.
The thing about being in a band is that the past is remembered, you retain the ability to pull out obscure songs from the past. When you’re a solo artist, and have a large catalogue of material, the process becomes far more difficult given the fact that even if those that play with you are brilliant musicians (which Stu, Blake, and Milos are), it’s simply impossible for us to work up that sort of live catalogue given that we live in different cities and the time that we have to prepare is limited. With the old band it was different. We had a rehearsal space, we could get together whenever we wanted. These days I have to fly to the other side of the country to do it. That would be why preparing for an acoustic tour is much easier and the songs that I’m able to perform are greater in number – because I can sit in my basement and do it.
I don’t even know where I’m going with this. I have a break in my schedule right now, so decided to sit down and write. I think I’m going to go lay down and think some more.
Hello....I'm J-moose. And after a long absence I have decided to return. I don't consider the last few posts on this page real posts at all. A side of me just wanted to say that i've actually posted something on the site so it'll satisfy anyone who looks at it. Wrong! No, that's not what I intended this site to be. Me posting random videos of things I like. This site was meant to be about me, and every little thought that comes into my mind. When I first started it, I had all this reason to write and to get those thoughts out into the world. Now, it just seems like I've gotten so lazy that even when something thought provoking comes along I can't get it out.
Just now for instance, my mind kept telling me to listen to "Bittersweet Symphony" by The Verve. A beautiful song that I've never given much credit to. That's not what i'm here to discuss. The thing that i'm more concerned about is why it choose to make itself known to me now. I think it has to do with all the worrying i've been doing lately. Yes, I worry, quite a lot actually. I can hide it well, since i've done nothing but hide for years. It's quite a lovely talent. I'm looking at the lyrics for the song and after reading it over a few times I think I understand why I wanted to hear it. It's a song about life....life and how some people will be a slave to one road and one thing. Richard Ashcroft, the writer of this song, uses money as the one thing we concern ourselves with. "You're a slave to money then you die" Ouch..I may not be a slave to money, but I can't say i've never not been concerned with the cost of certain things, like college.
Then there's another line. "But i'm a million different people from one day to the next, I can't change". I think I relate most with this line. Jamie, J-moose, Jay, James, all different names i've been called for years, with the more prominent being Jamie and J-moose. It's hard to be one person. I try hard, more than people will ever know, to become someone likeable. I know when I worked at wal-mart I was this odd, rude, egotistical teenager who.....I can't even word it properly. How stupid is that? I can't even give an accurate description of myself. I still believe that to this day, Shelby wanted to slap me, more than she would have with Jared, and believe me she disliked Jared more than anyone. Then again, I could be completely wrong and just really paranoid.
When I arrived here at college, my biggest concern was, who should I be? There's tons of students here, some i'll never even meet, but for the ones I do, I still do not know who I will be to them. There are days when i'll be in a big group of people and I will have some random thought pop into my head, so i'll try to bring their conversation closer towards the thought in my head, just so I can say it. I feel odd when I do that. Jamie wants to keep his mouth shut, but J-moose wants to talk and never stop. My roommate is much more outgoing than I am, and he can meet new people no problem. That's a great quality in a lot of the people here, but it's not something in me. I can't do that. Going up to a crowd of people and saying "Hey" or getting involved in an ongoing conversation.
I feel energetic yet I know I have to sleep. I feel tired yet my mind says keep writing. It wants me to tell everything stored up in it since my last real blog, but I can't. I can't let people know everything..It would take away from the potential for future blogs.
Dirty enough I got me a love and it's so bad, it's so bad. Hello time bomb, ready to go off.
I don't know if it's possible or not, but in the world of tv I guess almost anything is. I was watching the show One Tree Hill, something i've found myself doing as of late, and to my surprise, tonights episode struck a chord with me. The episode dealt with the main characters and some one off characters having to spend an hour truely getting to know someone. Of course as per tv standards someone ends up with a goth, another a firm believer in God, while some end up with people they already know and re-evaluate why they are friends. They are given 50 minutes to complete a list of things they must learn about one another, as well as a camera to take a photo of how they see this person. Naturally it's a whole life changing event for the kids of tree hill high, but the question that intrigued me was, is it really possible to change your life in 50 minutes?
What happens in 50 minutes? It's 10 minutes until the next hour, or 50 past the current. If you take a shower are you dry in 50 minutes? Can you lose a pound in 50 minutes or can you put one on? This episode showed me something that i'd forgotten about, high school people in particular. Despite the fact that everyone in my graduating class has already enjoyed one year of college or university, I still think some of them will apply to the labels that are given out to every student. My label? Loner. Yeah I had some friends, but I prefered my solitude most days. I hated highschool and most of the people in BT were either idiots or sluts. If I had the oppurtunity to spend 50 minutes with someone in that school, doing what the cast of One Tree Hill did, I don't know what i'd learn about them. Logically thinking, the shows actors have scripts they keep too, so of course their characters will reveal their deepest darkest secrets at the slightest whim. In real life, if I had to spend 50 minutes with one of the popular girls at BT, I would never tell them about me. It's not like they'd care enough to go, wow you so this way when I thought you were this way. Plus with the way students are at my school, someone would end up using the information to make you an outcast.
If I gave up tomorrow would the world even care? I'm not leaving a footprint, i'm not doing my share. I've had my fill of people and the way hold themselves. If I was giving up on them, i'd have to ask myself. Did you make sure they were happy, do you know that they're okay? If I was giving up them, i'd have to run away. And I know, that this world won't slow for them. It's too easy i'm not worthy of their time, but it's harder to forget, words and pictures that we have, so I write this down instead. I'm not sure I can help you, i'll only bring you pain, this isn't what I hope for, it's not like i'm to blame. It started with a promise I made some time ago. I asked for a favour which I just can't forget. My happiness comes second, because theirs I can't forget. I told myself be helpful, make them never walk away. I'm not sure I can keep this up, it's not like i'm around that much, so easily i'm scarred. When I see them hurting, it's hard to not break down.
I'm sorry for their sadness and I want to ease their pain, but when i'm all alone at night, i'm just another face.
I didn't intend to write this, but I heard a song by Matthew Good that inspired me. It's kind of written to the beat of said song, so technically I can't claim this as my own. If you interested, the song is "If I were A Tidal Wave" It's an acoustic track, and his acoustic stuff is pretty deep sometimes.
There's so much in this world that we take for granted...that I take for granted. I can't even begin to explain how much regret there is in this world. I'm regretful...hell i'm still stuck on living in the past. I'm one of those people that says "Maybe if i'd done it like this" or "I never should have said that". Days when regret comes to haunt you are the worst. Days when you feel that even when you act like yourself, your still covering up the real you. I hate acting like the real me. Everytime I do, I find myself saying things that make me seem so...incoherent. When I go to bed at night, I'm regretful of the way I act, and present myself to the world. There is no right way for me to be. There's the guy that has no life and wastes his time on wikipedia learning the stupidest things that have no relevancy towards anything. There's the guy that makes feeble attempts to try and be social and try not to be mean, but even he fails, because people still tell me they hate me (not even kidding, one of the girls at co-op legitimately said it and she doesn't regret it) and that i'm a jerk. Finally there's the guy that people get to know over time and somehow come to accept him, even though in the back his mind, he can't accept them for accepting him as it confuses the hell out of him as to why they do.
I believe that the world will fall under the weight of it's own ego. I believe we will be crushed by the power of our stupidity and ignorance. Why? Because we're so focused on winning something for our foolish pride that we can't see 10 ft in front of us. My eye look closed everyday, but I see what some people don't want me to. I appear like i'm not listening but I hear things and know things people don't want me to. You call me a snoop, but a snoop uses their information for personal gain. The day I give a fuck about someone I work with, I barely know, or will never see again, is the day I call myself "Castanza, lord of the idiots". George, fuck you and all you troubles. Not that I hate Seinfeld, but damn George is just annonying sometimes.
I love the world, don't get me wrong. But people need to learn where to draw the line. Girls who constantly believe Edward Cullen is coming for them, guys who think that by acting slick and greasing their hair will get them any girl on the dance floor. The husband who cheats on his wife, because "Everyone's doing it" or the wife that actually knows of her husbands filthy loins and doesn't care because she's got a job and house, why ruin it with a divorce. Give me one reason not to pretend like everyone else...someone has to have at least one, right?
I'm apologetic to be precise, it's not much but it's worth the wait.
I'll wipe the blood from this cut to prove a point, i'm bigger than your ego, and you'll never know. Define yourself through someone else, look in a mirror, there's no one starring back. We've all felt like you and now you'll feel it too, suck it up and look around, no one's crying for you.
I'm just a little bit jaded, but i'm content with life. Things can't be this bad, because i'm not giving up on the one thing that matters. Give me a the cards, and i'll cut them one last time. In this game, i'm always the winner.
This song won a golden globe for best original song in a motion picture back in 2008. It's from the movie "Into the Wild". This movie had a huge effect on me and always will. The novel which it's based off of is a true story about Christoper McCandless, a young man who ventured into the dreams that we all have. He tried to live off the land in Alaska but was ultimately killed by the harsh climate and starvation. I'm sure i've written about him before, but this song keeps coming back to me so I figured it deserved to be heard.
I've come to realize that life isn't anything I expected it would be like. Yeah, you get your up's and down's, but I was expecting there to be more of the up's. See, I have this crazy over active imagination that makes me think about stupid things. Like, oh J-moose, what if your life turned out this way and you had X amount of friends and did what they do. Or, damn wouldn't it be nice if you could write a guitar riff equal to the one's N comes up with and then write a kick-ass song together. Sometimes I get jealous, of all my friends. Some of them have lives which for the longest time I wished and prayed that I would have one day.
If it wasn't for my ability to view the world as it really is, I think i'd be lost in translation more often than not. Okay, here's something odd that I came upon from my lovely facebook account. I saw that one of the many people on my list had taken a quiz on "which teenage television show do you most relate to?" or something like that. Anyways, I apparently relate to "Boy Meets World", which i'm quite happy with since I grew up watching it. But the weird thing about the quiz was the questions it asked. What do you like to do on a friday night, what's the one word that describes you in your group of friends. What do you do when faced with a problem? Personally I hated the answers I gave, mainly because they were completely fake and not true. Sure i'd love to hang out with friends on a friday night...but I work everyfriday and don't go out after. Yes I call my friends right away when faced with a problem because they definitely want to hear me whine and bitch for 20 mintues about something they really don't care that much about.
No, life is not like a tv show. It never will be. I wouldn't want my problems to be exploited to the world for a cheap 5 minute thrill. If I ever do become famous, and God hoping one day I will and then I will use my incredible amount of fame to revert Muchmusic back into playing actual music videos and not just So You Think You Can Dance and One Tree Hill (although I do watch OTH if it's on. It's addicting) Anyways, if one day i'm famous, I plan to live my life here in Canada, probably somewhere in Vancouver or Toronto. Forget moving to L.A just because I can, it's not worth the trouble of living anywhere near the fake crap known as The Hill's or The City.
There's always something or someone to write about, and today it's about somone. Someone I hold very close to my heart. Someone who I love very much (friendship love), because she makes me laugh, she makes me smile, she's there when i'm feeling down and she's got this aura of kindness that surrounds her even when she's not feeling at her best.
I've only known her for about 3-4 years, possibly a bit more, but it feels like I could have known her years ago in another time and place. This girl embodies what some people would crazy , overly hyper (which I have never seen anyone else match), down to earth, loving, sweet, and a whole list of things I can't even begin to describe. I've had the privledge and the honour to call her one of my best friends, for a while and I would never want that to change.
I recall the first time we really started to talk and build our friendship. It was in grade 1o english. We sat next to one another and would talk while working. When we read from whatever play we were doing from shakespeare, our teacher would tell us what points we should highlight or put a star beside. I would never really do it, but she would reach over and do it for me. Of course I would just look over at her like she was crazy but in really, I was thankful she did it.
Thank you, for being you and for all that you do. The lovely, Kristina Graham.
1)As nerdy as it sounds, this show is freaking sweet. 2)The theme song is pretty damn awesome 3) Vash The Stampede, a gunman like no other has the greatest quote of all time.....
For us Canadian's music is a huge part of who are we. It represent's our country in a way that we can be proud of and have something that we can share with the rest of the world. However, even with all of the amazing band's that Canada has going for it, every year we manage to overlook some of the best music that's been released. Today was the one day out of the year where we should have been proud of some of the great albums that were released this year. Yet, every year that this day comes, we are subjected to the same cock and bull story..."And the Juno goes to.....Nickelback!".
That's right, tonight at General Motor's Place in Vancouver, we had to go through another year of "And the Juno goes to....Nickelback". First off, the juno should never go to Nickelback...ever. They have no talent. Don't get me wrong, at one point and time, I was a fan of them, I even own their album "The Long Road", which was suprisingly decent. All joking matters aside though, if I were to go pull out an album review of their latest effort, "Dark Horse", i'm pretty sure I would see nothing but negativity. It sounds exactly the same as their last two albums, and it's pretty much the same story with their singles. The first one is usually a sappy song filled with remorse or wanting to be more than one could ever aspire to be. Not that there's ever anything wrong with that, but for after 5 or 6 albums, it's gotten pretty lame. Then there's the second single, that focuses on Chad Kroeger getting laid. I'm not going into details with that, because the thought of Chad Kroeger being able to right about "Something In Your Mouth" or going at it like "Animals", just creeps me out.
I know i'm probably going to get penalized for this, but in times of dire need, Matthew Good always seems to hit the nail on the head. I'm not mentioning him because he's my favourite artist, but I do have a good reason. Good's been nominated numerous times over the years, be for it stuff he did with the Matthew Good Band, or his solo work, but not once has he ever gone to the juno's. Not once. If memory serves me right, Dave Genn, the ex-rhythm guitar player for MGB went one year because he heard there was an open bar. A little off topic, but i'll get back to my point. This quote is taken from his site and I think it says what I wanted to, but with a little more meaning behind it
"There are a lot of don’ts in the music business. One of them is having the audacity to pronounce the belief that art is not a competition and that trophies needn’t be handed out to validate what any artist would intrinsically do even if they spent the majority of their time working at a gas station and the rest of it recording poor quality demos in some basement suite on an antiquated cassette four-track. Ya, some of us have the gall to make a living at it, but God forbid any of us dare openly express ourselves beyond the contents of a compact disc. We are, after all, lucky to be able to write, record, and perform music for a living – God knows the majority of us weren’t endowed with talent and just happened to grease our way through music’s formidable front door"
Well that explain's how Nickelback did it, along with Simple Plan, Good Charlotte, and numerous other's who some how are still making album after album of the same thing. Do we really need the Juno's, muchmusic, MTV, VH1 or any of these things anymore that are apparently the way we convey what is good and what is bad in the music industry? Muchmusic used to be one of my favourite stations to watch. The intererviews were pretty good, the music video's were always on when I came home from school, and late at night, you'd get those genre specific programs that they didn't air during the day. Now we get SYTYCD, and ABDC, along with Paris Hilton's British Best Friend, and other craptactular programming. I don't think The Punk is even on saturday night's anymore. I found some really good bands on that show, and now I when I flip to much at Midnight it's either, Meet The Barker's or T.I's Road to redemption. I don't care that your going to jail, but do you really have to get those last 15 minute's of fame before you go off to prison for a year? Wait, I shouldn't say that, I will Admit that T.I is a pretty decent artist, but his show is just so set by the standards of MTV that there really isn't anything I haven't seen before. Much had their own show like this a few years back, except it wasn't headed by anyone famous, and all they did was exploit kids who have had a loss in their life or are losing someone close to them in the next 5 months.
Sorry, I kind of had a spur of the moment anger fit with Muchmusic. It happens a little to often. Anyways, I'll say it again, do we really need an awards show that only praises those are repeat the same process every album? Do we need a show that has no idea what the meaning of the word "New" is? Because last time I checked, The Stills had two other albums under their belts, and to me when they finally get noticed by the mainstream and are being classified as new, it doesn't give me a lot of hope for the music's future.
In a young man's life, there are defining moments that pave his path to adulthood. The first, is his first kiss. Imagine if you will, a young man out on a date with the girl he admires so very much. He walks her up to her front step and she says the classic "I had a really nice time tonight" and he nods his head in agreement, palms sweaty as he rubs them against his jeans, trying to overcome his fear of the next few seconds. His mind his racing as he feels his body begin to move, yet he doesn't remember telling it to. Slowly, he reaches her lips and presses them against his, thus completing his first step into manhood. This was not the case for Max McKay. In fact, it had been quite the opposite for him. His first date had gone as well as one could expect it to, but when he tried to do this, his lady friend proceeded to go inside her house, and slam the door right on those puckered up lips. Yes, Max McKay was left high and dry with his lips, pulsing in pain. Oh, when I said slammed the door in his face, I mean literally slammed it in his face. It's a wonder nothing else got damaged, because in this writers opinion, that's all he has going for him.
Another stepping stone in a young man's life, is the first time he decides to drink. He's out with the boys, maybe a group of girls as well, having some fun, when...let's call him Timmy for intentive purposes, decides to pull out a bottle of rum or vodka, that he snuck out of his dad's cabinet and pass it around. Oh when that first drop of alcohol hit's that boy's mouth, he's hooked for the next 10-15 years, or at least until he get's married. That is if his wife isn't a male version of him, then all bets are off. This did not happen for Max Mckay. No, poor Max had a different tale of his first drink. Being the most daring out of his group of friends, it was Max who brought the booze, and it was Max who ended up drinking the most. His friends, unlike him, were able to control themselves, and had only a few sips of the drink they were offered. Max on the other hand decided that in order to liven things up, he would drink the whole bottle of vodka and see what would happen. If you use your imagination i'm sure you can figure it out.
Max ended up passing out on his friend Matthew's couch, only to awaken 20 minutes later and throw up on Matthew's carpet. Luckily, Matthew was home alone for a few days and figured out how to clean it before his parents ever found out. The third instance is probably the most obvious one, being the first time a man makes love. I won't go into details about this experience, as I've got more respect for myself and for anyone else out there who feel's awkward when reading about this topic. However, I will tell you about Max McKay's first time. As you probably guessed, it didn't happen in the regular perimeters of life. This is not to say that his first time wasn't memorable, but not so much in a good way. Max was at a party with his friends, having some drinks, letting themselves become intoxicated in the night, when he notices a girl from across the room. He quickly goes over and makes small talk for a few minutes, until she takes his hand and leads upstairs. She's goes into an empty room and tells him to wait before he comes in. Patiently, he did so, and before he knew it, her voice beckoned for him. He slowly reached for the door handle and walked in. Now, i'm going to let you assume that this ended badly for Max, as most events usually do. This was probably the worst of them all.
When Max opened the door, he saw two big, bruting guys standing there, cracking their knuckles. Two black eyes, a broken rip, and a sprained ankle later, Max wound up in a hospital, having his clothes taken from him, as well as his Wallet, his phone and his car keys. Life for Max McKay, was anything but ordinary.
I'm Jamie "J-moose" Harrison. I'm 18 at the moment and i'm still finding ways to see life in a new light. Pictures, books, movies. Anything that makes me think about how important time is, and just how valuable life is.
